Crush test dummies
by Confused23
Summary: Hermione likes….me'…..'I don't think she JUST likes you mate…'…..Dramione! 'I have to make Draco notice me. I love him'….R


**I got this idea off an episode of The Weekenders…I'd like to say that I was inspired by it… **

**Here we go…**

**Oh and...**

**Disclaimer: I don't anything of J.K Rowling's…or the weekenders or She's the Man. **

It was the trio's seventh year, the year after the war, 2 years after Dumbledore had been killed and the year that Hermione Granger had 'unfortunately' fallen in love with her fellow Head – Draco Malfoy.

February 2nd, 5:00 in the afternoon, found her in the Gryffindor common room.

"Oh Gin, I don't know what to do! He doesn't notice me at all!" She complained to her best friend's sister while they lounged on the chairs in the common room.

Ginny rolled her eyes and continued flicking through the latest edition of _Witch Weekly_.

"Patience, 'Mione, patience. Boyfriends….come to those who wait." She recited from an article in the magazine.

Hermione, who did not detect that her friend had absolutely no interest in what she was saying, sighed and mumbled;

"You're one to say."

She sat up with a huff.

"All he does is smirk at me…he doesn't even try to provoke me anymore. I need to find something that will-" she suddenly stopped. Her eyes widened and a huge smile spread across her face.

Ginny soon became aware that her friend had stopped talking and looked up.

"That's it!" Hermione exclaimed. She turned to Ginny with an excited gleam in her eyes.

Ginny raised an eyebrow. "What's it?"

Hermione looked like she temporarily couldn't breathe. "I've got an idea!" she waited for a reaction from Ginny.

Ginny noticed this after a moment and motioned for her to continue.

"Alright, you know how Harry has brilliant fashion sense?" She was making the same hand gestures Lavender made when she was explaining the different types of cosmetics she bought from the nearby shop in Hogsmeade.

Ginny looked bewildered. "He does?"

But Hermione didn't seem to hear her. "I'll convince him to go shopping with me at _Modern Witch_, so I can look gorgeous for Draco! And then you and Lavender, probably Parvati as well, can give me a makeover!" she leaned back into the chair with a satisfied smile, staring at an ugly looking cushion which was next to a very nice-looking one.

_That's probably what I look next Draco,_ she thought.

Abruptly, she turned to Ginny (who was still looking at her with her mouth open).

"I have to make Draco notice me, I love him. I need Harry; I have to make him love me!" Hermione cried dramatically.

**(A/N I want you all to know that…Harry is not gay. Thank you. :D)**

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"Mate, I really think the Chudley Cannons have a chance to win this National Quidditch cup."

Harry sighed. "I don't know Ron. Even Puddlemere United looks like it has a better chance. And that's bad." He gave Ron a significant look "Sorry, mate."

Ron grumbled something incoherent and walked a little faster.

They were going back to Gryffindor tower from the kitchens with some chocolate cake for the girls.

Harry caught up with Ron. "So when are you going to break it off with Lav Lav so you can ask Hermione out?" Harry asked with an amused glint in his eye.

Ron scowled at him. "I told you Harry; _nothing_ is going to happen between us. _Except a strong friendship bond. _And that's not _going_ to happen; it's already happened." He said with a tone that did not match what he was saying.

Harry suddenly remembered something. "Hey Ron, don't you think Hermione's been acting a bit strange around us?"

Ron looked thoughtful for a millisecond then shrugged. "Not really."

It was Harry's turn to scowl. "I just feel like there's something she's not telling us."

They finally came to the Fat lady's portrait. She looked at them expectantly.

"_Draco dormeins_"

The portrait swung open and the two boys walked in their cozy common room.

They spotted Hermione and Ginny next to the fireplace and slowly made their way to them.

They stopped in their tracks though…when they heard Hermione pledge her undying love to Harry!

Actually, her exact words were '-I love him. I need Harry; I have to make him love me!'

They gasped and raced out the portrait hole.

"Hermione likes…_me_?" Harry panted to Ron as soon as they were safe outside the common room.

Ron shook his head seriously and placed a hand on his best friends shoulder. "I don't think she _just_ likes you mate; she_ loves_ you."

Harry clutched his head and looked around frantically. "But that could mean anything. She loves me as a brother, she loves me like a best friend, she loves me like a-"

Ron sighed sadly, as if his friend had regrettably gone mad.

"I don't think so Harry."

Harry just stared at a wall with his hands still clutching his head.

Then he straightened up with his hands on his sides, so that he looked very much like an army officer.

He looked at the Fat Lady and said to Ron;

"I'm going to be the mature adult that I am and confront her about her feelings, and tell her that I don't feel the same way about her." He had a very determined look on his face.

"_Draco dormeins_"

They walked in.

Well, Ron walked and Harry stalked. They marched right up to Hermione and Ginny. Harry opened his mouth to start his Talk.

Just then Hermione turned around, with a sparkle in her eye. A bright grin slid onto her face.

"Harry, Ron! ...wait, where is the chocolate cake?" she looked at them suspiciously. They gulped.

"It was him." They both said at the same time, pointing their fingers at one another.

She narrowed her eyes.

They quickly withdrew their fingers.

"It was me." They said at the same time, yet again.

Ron smacked his forehead with his hand.

Hermione's eyes narrowed further.

Harry winced.

And Ginny listened, but didn't make it _too_ obvious.

"You can get us more, later. But there's something much more important." She announced.

Harry and Ron exchanged looks.

Could it be?

"Harry, I need you…" –Both boys' eyes widened–"…You have to come with me to-"

Harry interrupted her hastily "I have to go Hermione; I need to go…uh…..shave. Sorry." He ran for the stairs leading to the boy's dormitory. Hermione followed him with her eyes, a genuinely confused look on her face.

When she looked back to where Ron was standing; he wasn't there. Then she turned to Ginny, who held the magazine right in front of her face and seemed to be shaking with laughter.

Hermione became frustrated and pulled down the magazine. Ginny took one look at her face…then burst out laughing. She was rolling on the floor, clutching her sides. Hermione plopped down on a chair with her arms crossed against her chest and a glare on her face that would make even Voldemort cower in fear.

Ginny just kept laughing.

Hermione looked down at her. "Ginny, I don't know what you find so amusing!" she scolded. Ginny stopped laughing, looked at her then started laughing again.

"It's…..just...your face – more laughter – you….looked…so rejected – more laughter – it was…just….SO SAD!" then she howled with laughter again.

"Yes, I can see that you really feel sorry for me." Hermione commented sarcastically.

After a few minutes, Ginny's laughter finally started fading away and she got up from her ridiculous position on the floor.

"Sorry….what is it that you are going to do?" she asked dutifully.

Hermione took a deep breath.

"I don't know. You saw how Harry and Ron acted just now…it was like they knew something..."

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"Did you hear her? She said 'I need you, Harry' like it was the most….obvious thing in the world!"

Harry was panicking, and Ron was not happy about that.

"It was 'Harry, I need you'. And I just realized that your reaction was not very normal. See, if I had been in your place, I would have said 'I knew she'd eventually fall for my irresistible charm and good looks.' THEN I would start panicking because I don't feel anything for my best friend except that she's my friend and I love her in an un-romantic way." Ron said.

Harry stopped his moment of insanity and looked at Ron. "You're funny." He said flatly then he went back to clutching his head and banging it on the wall.

"Okay, how about this; why weren't you the so-called mature adult you are? I need to go shave? Honestly Harry!" Ron shook his head in disbelief.

Harry was put out. "Well, what else was I supposed to say?" he asked exasperatedly, waving his arms about.

Ron shrugged.

"'Oh, hello Hermione. I must say, I overheard you saying that you were in love with me…I'm sorry but I don't feel the same way. Goodbye.'" Harry said in a posh English voice.

Ron looked at him blankly.

"Um…yes?"

Harry looked at Ron for a whole minute, his expression murderous, confused, incredulous and torn between something.

Then he straightened up, attempted to smooth down his unruly hair and wiped the sweat off his forehead. He looked at Ron firmly.

"That's it. I'm going in." and with that, he marched out their dorm and down the stairs to the common room.

When he got down, he found his best friend playing Exploding Snap with a person he actually loved romantically.

He marched up to them feeling like he should stop, salute and say 'Sir, yes, Sir!'

"..Hah! That's the third time I've won." Ginny snickered at her black-faced friend.

Harry sat down on a chair next to them.

"My, my, what lovely weather we are having." He said monotonously, with a fake smile plastered on his face.

Ginny and Hermione exchanged looks.

"Harry, it's stormy…" Ginny said slowly.

Harry started panicking at his mistake.

Then Hermione started talking.

"Anyway, why did you run off before? I needed you! You have to-"

Harry was really panicking now.

"-Come with me to Hogsmeade so I can-"

"Uh, sorry Hermione. Got to dash…I need to go….uh…shake a leaf." And he ran for the staircase leading to the boys dormitories for the second time that day.

It was from that day forward, that Harry avoided any conversation with Hermione that started with 'I need you'.

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Hermione was getting very annoyed. The Hogsmeade trip was in a day and she still hadn't told Harry that she needed to go shopping with him.

Every time she decided to ask him, he would hurriedly make some excuse and leave. It was all very confusing.

"That's it Harry! I'm going to ask you something, and you're not going to runaway like you usually do these days. For Merlin's sake, be. A. Man!" Hermione shouted at him one day while they were out on the Quidditch pitch having a little bit of a picnic.

Harry looked solemn and guilty. "Say what you have to say Hermione. I'm not going to stop you."

Hermione stared at him then shook her head and continued.

"You, Harry, are going to accompany me to Hogsmeade this Saturday. Do you understand?" She asked him professionally.

Harry sighed and decided against breaking his best friends' heart. "Okay Hermione, I-I'll…I'll go."

Hermione let out a sigh of relief. "Thank Merlin! I was wondering who else would help me with the clothes part of the makeover!" she felt like a weight had been lifted off her shoulders.

Harry nodded.

Then did a double take. "Makeover?" he asked skeptically.

Hermione grinned. "Yes, I forgot to tell you about it. I was just so focused with the way you've been acting."

Harry found it hard to process what she was saying in. "so you didn't want me to go to Hogsmeade with you because you are madly in love with me?" He asked her, just to make sure.

Hermione's jaw dropped then she burst out laughing.

Ron and Ginny were watching the whole exchange between the friends. Ginny's jaw was dropped and Ron was turning red for his friend.

Eventually Hermione stopped laughing.

"You thought I was in love with _you_?" Hermione asked in amazement.

"W-well, uh…Y-yes" Harry spluttered. He blushed a deep crimson – something that didn't usually happen.

"We overheard you say that, you know." Ron piped up. Hermione turned to look at him.

"And what exactly did I say?"

Ron's ears instantly turned red and he gave a nervous laugh.

"You said…" he trailed off becoming redder.

"I said…" Hermione waited for him to continue.

"You said…" he trailed off again, running his fingers through his hair.

"I said…" Hermione repeated nodding slowly.

Ron stood up and paced back and forth.

Back and forth.

Hermione was frozen; her hands still gesturing for Ron to continue, mouth slightly open and her eyes were wide in anticipation.

Harry was thinking of ways to run for it.

Ginny still had her jaw dropped, her eyes seeing everything and her ears listening.

Out of the blue, Ron jumped around to Hermione.

"You said you're in love with Harry and you had to make him love you!" Ron declared finally.

Both Ginny and Hermione gasped.

Harry turned to run when Hermione said something that made them freeze with in surprise.

"I didn't say that…I said; I have to make Dean notice me, I love him. I need Harry; I have to make him love me!" Hermione seemed to realize her mistake because she gasped and covered her mouth with her hands.

"You love _Dean_?!" Harry asked doubtfully "_Dean Thomas_?"

He looked at Ron, who looked back at him…shock evident on both their faces.

As they did this, Hermione winked at Ginny -who winked back- and went back to looking guilty.

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The day was fine. Birds were singing, the sun was shining, the grass was green…

…And Hermione Granger had finally gotten a makeover.

"'Mione…its time to make your entering…" Lavender Brown announced, as she came through the door.

Hermione stood up, closed her eyes, took deep calming breaths then opened her eyes and smiled graciously.

She swept out of the room and down the stairs.

Gasps were to be heard around the common room. There were 'who's that?'s and 'Hermione Granger!'s and 'I really can't believe it's.

Hermione looked down and walked out of the room to the Great Hall.

On her way, people were looking…_really_ looking.

She finally made it to her destination…where breakfast was being served.

She held her head high and marched through the doors.

Every head swiveled in her direction and she felt it was like a bad movie.

But she spotted someone moving away from her view with a sign that said: 'Turn' and giggled.

She walked right up to Ron and Harry, who were gaping at her, and sat down.

"Hermione?" Ron asked unsurely.

"Ron?" she answered back unsurely, then smirked. He blushed fervently and continued to fill his bottomless pit of a stomach.

Hermione filled her plate and made conversation with her friends. Every now and then, she would nonchalantly peek at the Slytherin table. Every time her hopes sank down when she saw that Draco was not staring at her like she was the beautiful creature his eyes had ever beheld, that he was not making his way to her to pull her into a kiss then afterwards declare his perpetual love for her and that he was not not coming anywhere near Pansy Parkinson.

She was officially in a depressed mood.

She excused herself from the table and walked away to her favourite place to think.

This place was a raised ground (not a hill) which if you walked till the very end of it you would fall with a splash, into the Black lake.

Hermione was on the very edge of this ground and she was staring at the water intensely as she fought the tears that welled up in her eyes.

"You look beautiful." Said a voice that sounded so familiar, though she didn't want to think about _that _too much.

And she did…look beautiful. Her hair, which had grown out of its frizzy state to a more curly stage in the summer before her fifth year, was wavy and was halfway down her back. Her dress was baby blue and reached down to her knees. It was tight from her bust to her waist and flowed from there.

And strapless.

The most amusing thing about her outfit, were the white flip-flops she chose to wear.

She didn't turn around. "The person I wanted to impress didn't think so."

"And who might that be?" The Person enquired.

"Why should I tell you?" she asked, annoyed.

The Person chuckled. "Ah, Granger, That's a very good question. What if I try to grab you this person's attention?"

Hermione gasped and whipped around. "Draco!" and she took a step back onto nothing, lost her balance and fell into the water.

It took Draco a moment to register that someone important had just fell into the water and was possibly drowning.

"Granger!" he yelled, his eyes searching the water.

When he got no answer, he stripped off his shirt and dived in.

He opened his eyes underwater and saw her struggling to get to the surface. He swam swiftly to her and pushed her to the surface while holding her waist.

They came up. Hermione was breathing heavily and Draco was panting. He pulled her over to the flat side of the lake and placed her on the edge. He hauled himself onto the grass.

Hermione had her eyes closed with a hand over her heart. Draco crawled over to her and placed a hand under her head as support.

"Are you alright?"

Her eyes flashed open. "So it really is you?" she asked in amazement.

"No it's not." He smirked.

She ignored this. "You said I was beautiful." She said with the same dazed expression.

"Yes. I am well aware of that." Draco was uncomfortable. They were silent.

"Do you still want to know the person I wanted to impress?" Hermione asked softly.

Draco looked directly into her eyes. "Yes."

"The biggest git, prat and bouncing ferret of all Hogwarts…Draco Malfoy." She broadcasted grandly with a blush.

"And do you want to know why I said you were beautiful?"

Hermione nodded.

"Because you are…and I love you." And then he gave her a chaste kiss, held her hand and lay next to her.

"I'm so glad we're back together." Hermione said happily.

Moments passed…when Hermione spoke up, with a grin on her face.

"So, uh…do you like cheese?"

"What?!"

**this one-shot didn't turn out what I expected…but I still like it. :D its supposed to be funny…but I don't know if any of you think it is…**

**Btw…that was my first ever dramione AND one-shot…**

**PLZ Review!**

**Luv, **

**Confused23**


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